THE SECRET TO HAPPINESS IS…

I read the following quote from the Stoic philosopher Epictetus in the first week of my alcohol-free journey, over three and a half years ago and it, quite frankly, changed my life. Here you go… ‘It’s not events that shape our lives, but our beliefs about them.’

If you just take a moment to take in the enormity of this one line, you will see it holds the answer to the secret of how to change the direction of your life. By changing your beliefs you can change your story and change your life.

Epictetus is saying ‘Life’ is what you ‘Believe’ it to be and nothing else. If you can control your beliefs, you control your life.

Similarly Einstein, said ‘The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe’. This simply means, the beliefs we create can put us in paradise or purgatory.

Psychologist have a model called the EBA Sequence, which is happening all day long, over and over – we experience lots of Events, which we form Beliefs about that lead to emotions and Actions.

EVENT – Events happen to us all the time. For example, you miss a train, have an argument, someone is rude to you, you win a prize, you pass an exam, lose your glasses, someone close dies, climate change, pandemic etc. etc.

BELIEFS – You then try to make sense of these Events by forming a set of Beliefs about them based on your past experiences, values and explanatory style. Explanatory styles can be optimistic or pessimistic.

ACTION – Based on your Beliefs about the Event you then experience emotions that drive your Actions.

If our beliefs are negative and unhelpful the emotions produced lead to actions that cause more stress and unhappiness. Equally, if our beliefs are helpful and positive you can thrive in any situation! All you have to do is master the skill of controlling your beliefs so you feel the right emotions that trigger the right actions that support your goals, health, happiness and performance.

Life is what you believe it to be and nothing

Walking Back To Happiness: The Secret To Alcohol-Free Living & Well-Being shows you how I changed my story and found happiness and well-being and how you can to. Packed with over 70 exercises or steps you can take to improve your well-being and happiness, it’s a blueprint of how to live your best life! https://www.amazon.co.uk/Nigel-Jones/e/B0B7RP6LH6/

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